Tag Archives: dream

dream the impossible?

22 May

Do you have a bucket list? I don’t have a bucket list but I do have a list of 100 things I’d like to do. Some of the things on my list feel impossible to carry out, but lately I’ve wondered what impossible means.

The dictionary definition states, “Not possible; incapable of being done, of existing, etc.; unattainable in the nature of things, or by means at command; insuperably difficult under the circumstances; absurd or impracticable; not feasible. “[1913 Webster]

Impossible is not a word I use often in my vocabulary, but if I do it would be in reference to something I could not do physically, mentally or due to monetary circumstances. I have been challenged to alter my thoughts on what I believe impossible.

A friend and I meet once a month for what we call our Creative Blitz. During our time together, we head to Starbucks, buy our respective drinks and pick the best seats for our meeting. We’ve created our own lists of things we want to move forward with in our lives. There are six items on my list and each month I add action items. 

When it was time for our second meeting, I felt stagnation setting in. In reviewing my list however, I realized I had focused on five things on my list! I left our meeting feeling hopeful that I was one step closer to actualizing my list.  🙂  It’s amazing to me that by simply listing what I want to carry out, and being held accountable, I’ve made some progress!! 

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another nightmare

12 Mar

I had a dream last weekend and it’s still bothering me so I decided to blog about it. It is my hope that writing about it will bring more insight and I can let it go.

In the dream I was chased by a man. He carried a metal/steel type of crimper. If he caught someone, he’d clamp steel oval links on their tongue or on part of their face, but for most it seemed to be on the tongue. He caught me and though I do not remember the real crimping, I had two clamps on the right side of my tongue. Though the links were oval to being with, once crimped, they became ridged and flattened into a rectangular shape.

He pursued me and I hid in a room with another woman. As he came near I hid in a smaller room, almost closet sized, with a small window. The other woman did not hide fast enough and he grabbed her. He was crimping the steel ovals on her, I did not see where, and each time he crimped another she made a low moaning/groan sound. I decided to climb out the window but as I slid the pane open it made a slight sound. I wasn’t sure if I should continue with my intent to escape because if he heard the window he’d know I was there and find me. The window was small and I knew it would take some time to wriggle my body out of the opening.

Suddenly my inner voice was telling me to wake up, it was just a dream. I started to shake my head and woke from the dream. The sound was actually my daughter making the same sound as the woman in the dream. She was dreaming too.

I can’t shake this dream. I still get this feeling when I remember the sound the woman was making. So…what did the dream mean?!

My tongue is clamped by a man. Is there something I need to stop talking about? He only clamps the right side of my tongue though. Have I been talking negatively about someone or myself lately? Is there something I need to express that I’m feeling anxious about?

I’m running away from something. Is it the negative situation I’m talking about?

The window, my outlook, my perception of the outer world. My concern that I won’t fit or will take some time to wiggle out of the window. Is this a concern of not fitting in, my perception of myself?

i dreamed a dream

23 Feb

I had a dream the other night and I need to discuss it to derive some meaning from it. I was living in on a street lined with reddish brick houses and small apartment buildings in a very large city. I was walking across the alley between my building and the neighbouring building. It was a sunny day and I was with my son who was about three years old. The street was tree-lined. It was an upper class part of the city.

A black man dressed in a suit who was walking on the sidewalk in front of the buildings, stopped to make conversation. He seemed like a pleasant  man, friendly, well dressed, however when he asked my son where he went to school I continued on my way to get inside our building. I didn’t think this man had any business knowing where my son went to school and quietly told my son not to answer the question.

What’s odd is that in the dream my son was only old enough for preschool, but in my mind I was hearing the name of his current elementary school.

Once we were inside I spoke with my Mom. She was in my apartment, for a visit I believe. I told her about the man and his question to my son. My Mom didn’t seem to think it was an odd question. Instead she asked me if I ever played out in front of the building in the little swing area. In my mind I could see a small area about 8′ x 8′ with a swing set. She seemed to find it curious that we never ventured in front of the building to play.

This is all I remember of the dream. I know there was another part but my memory fails me as I type so I’ll add it another time.

If you have any thoughts, please speak up!  I trusted the man until he started asking personal information. I didn’t answer him just hurried off. Why didn’t I just reply? My Mom did not share my concern. Was I being overly cautious? I didn’t understand why a stranger wanted to know where my son went to school.  I hurried off to hide inside. Hmmm, hiding inside myself when someone asks personal information. Not wanting to share my personal side? Not feeling supported by my Mom, my own feminine side, my own Mothering side?

bizarre dreaming

4 Feb

In my continuation of the dream theme, last night mine was quite bizarre. I dreamed I was having open heart surgery. It was apparently a more simple procedure than most people might have and so I was under a general anesthetic. My incision spiraled around my heart, down the left side of my body, across my lower abdomen and up the right side of my body. I started to wake when the female doctor was finishing the last stitches. I did not feel any pain but could feel the tugging as she sewed me together.

The next dream I was at home, a different home than I live in, but my home in the dream. It was a two storey home, large wood siding gray in colour. I remembering wondering why nobody was asking about the surgery or even seeming to notice my body’s shape as I walked or shuffled around the main floor of the house. The main floor of the house was actually on the second storey which had a large deck off the living room/hallway. My spoke with my daughters, asking them to pick up their dirty clothes off their bedroom floor. My elder daughter proceeded to stuff four nice sweaters into a black cloth bag. The bag has a draw string closure which she pulled tight before saying she had made a new door stop. I was not happy that she had stuffed her nice sweaters into a bag she intended to use as a door stop. Her Dad came to her defense saying what a great idea it was. I looked in the bag and remember distinctly one light gray sweater which was a light weight wool and adorned with pale pink rhinestones.

To calm myself I went outside on the deck, but took a green plastic watering can with me so everyone would think I was going outside to do something, other than get away from the situation inside. The deck was wet with rain water and the sky was gray as though it was going to rain again. When I looked in the planters they were all full of rain water and I felt foolish for bringing the watering can outside with me. I remember talking to myself about how silly it was.

I have not figured out what the meaning of this dream yet. Lots of gray colour, feelings of inadequacy, sadness, embarrassment and concern over what others thought. I was trying to look busy with purpose than have people know or see my feelings. Moving away from emotions or emotionally tense situations. I was not grounded, even the main floor of the house was on the second storey which gives me the feeling of being ungrounded. The plants were over watered by Mother nature, drowning in their planters. To fix my heart the doctor had to cut open my entire core. I’m unsure what that speaks to me.

I will have to sit with this dream a bit longer to understand the meaning and message for me. Where do I feel inadequate in my life now? This is the question I hear and need to answer.

the dreams of a stay at home Mom

14 Jan

Imagine waking up every morning with the feeling that you will accomplish everything your heart desires. Think about it, and it will happen. The business you want to open, the unfulfilled dream, the path you yearn to explore, the unseen view from your window. What would your response be if someone told you, “It’s all out there waiting for you!” 

This is the year I plan to explore manifesting my desires!  I have read enough books, watched enough movies, heard about other women whose dreams came true. I’m ready to jump up and down scream, “When is it my turn?”   I’m not a yogi and I don’t meditate daily. I am a recently unemployed stay at home Mom, who volunteers for almost everything because I can’t say no.  I am a devoted Mom who takes time for herself at least once a week to sing with a choir when I’d rather be singing solos to get all the applause. I do my best not to live vicariously through my children, but to encourage them to live their dream.

So this is it. This is my year. I’m 44 and ready to make it all happen. In 2010, I’m going to finally start to live my dream…if I can figure out what that dream is!  

Who’s with me? I dare you to dream along this year too!

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