Tag Archives: meaning

bizarre dreaming

4 Feb

In my continuation of the dream theme, last night mine was quite bizarre. I dreamed I was having open heart surgery. It was apparently a more simple procedure than most people might have and so I was under a general anesthetic. My incision spiraled around my heart, down the left side of my body, across my lower abdomen and up the right side of my body. I started to wake when the female doctor was finishing the last stitches. I did not feel any pain but could feel the tugging as she sewed me together.

The next dream I was at home, a different home than I live in, but my home in the dream. It was a two storey home, large wood siding gray in colour. I remembering wondering why nobody was asking about the surgery or even seeming to notice my body’s shape as I walked or shuffled around the main floor of the house. The main floor of the house was actually on the second storey which had a large deck off the living room/hallway. My spoke with my daughters, asking them to pick up their dirty clothes off their bedroom floor. My elder daughter proceeded to stuff four nice sweaters into a black cloth bag. The bag has a draw string closure which she pulled tight before saying she had made a new door stop. I was not happy that she had stuffed her nice sweaters into a bag she intended to use as a door stop. Her Dad came to her defense saying what a great idea it was. I looked in the bag and remember distinctly one light gray sweater which was a light weight wool and adorned with pale pink rhinestones.

To calm myself I went outside on the deck, but took a green plastic watering can with me so everyone would think I was going outside to do something, other than get away from the situation inside. The deck was wet with rain water and the sky was gray as though it was going to rain again. When I looked in the planters they were all full of rain water and I felt foolish for bringing the watering can outside with me. I remember talking to myself about how silly it was.

I have not figured out what the meaning of this dream yet. Lots of gray colour, feelings of inadequacy, sadness, embarrassment and concern over what others thought. I was trying to look busy with purpose than have people know or see my feelings. Moving away from emotions or emotionally tense situations. I was not grounded, even the main floor of the house was on the second storey which gives me the feeling of being ungrounded. The plants were over watered by Mother nature, drowning in their planters. To fix my heart the doctor had to cut open my entire core. I’m unsure what that speaks to me.

I will have to sit with this dream a bit longer to understand the meaning and message for me. Where do I feel inadequate in my life now? This is the question I hear and need to answer.

nightmare or full of meaning

23 Jan

Last night I had a dream some might label a nightmare. In the dream I was the observer, but also the young woman killed. I only remember the last part of the dream in which I saw a dress, my dress, laying on the ground and covered in blood. The dress was neatly laid out, sleeveless, creamy white background with large red flowers, would have come to just above my knees, fitted but not tight, loose but not flowing. Beside the dress was a typed note. As I started to type this description, the text now escaped my memory, but it was something referring to a part of me being killed.

I dream often but not always dreams such as this one. When I do have vivid dreams of someone dying, I wake feeling scared and sometimes so fearful I don’t want to get up to use the washroom. The strange this about last night, I did not wake full of fear but full of questions about the dream. What did it mean? Was it related to the story I am currently reading? What message does the mystery hold for me now?

My thoughts tell me the dream was a message of letting go. There is a need to let go of a part of my younger female self before I can move forward. I also wonder who it was in the dream I felt was trying to kill or get rid of that part of me. Am I killing or stifling a part of my younger self that I need to keep alive?

At the end of the dream, I was looking at a 4″x4″ photograph of the dress and note which lay beside the dress. The photo was the size and bordering you might find on an old black and white picture, however this was a coloured photograph. I still have a clear image in my mind of the dress but cannot see any blood stains on it. I owned a dress like it in style, but never wore the colour red in a floral pattern.

I find my dreams and the dreams of those in my life quite fascinating. I will probably think about the image on and off  during the day until a feeling of knowing settles in. I will know when the meaning of the dream feels right.

Do you have any dreams to share?

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